In 2010, I made a courageous decision to join the Air Force as a teenager. I had no clue what I was getting into. But, I was up for the challenge. My mother was afraid for me. She felt I was too little in stature. But the strength within me was like a giant. I couldn’t suppress my desire to break boundaries for someone else’s IDEA of who I was “supposed” to be.
This song linked below is from one of my favorite childhood movies, Mulan. Mulan faces a similar challenge, which was to bring her family honor by pretending to be someone she was not OR to follow her heart’s desire.
Many people suffer with this cycle even into adulthood. It goes from GUILT for wanting to be ourselves to SHAME for slightly following through with our desires. Next, there’s the labeling of DISHONOR for not staying in character. Lastly, there’s REDEDICATION/recommitment to the ROLE. And then the cycle repeats until eventually it becomes old.
At some point, we all have to find the courage to forsake all others in order to truly discover our authentic self. The word ‘forsake’ is often given a negative connotation. But it simply means to deny, refuse, dispute, or renounce something or someone. Sometimes we have to challenge what others are coaching us into. The agenda MAY be protection. But, the underlying reason for the protection could be based on false perceptions and projections of THEIR past experiences. And we cannot dedicate our journeys to someone else’s experience. We have to gain our own to get clarity.
Any person who is MEANT to accompany you during your journey will support you in all of your endeavors out of unconditional love. Sometines the very individuals holding you back are those YOU assigned to do so. I love and accept myself unconditionally, so individuals on the same frequency are the only ones who have permission to be a voice in my ear.
People can only love you at the capacity of love you hold for yourself. So if you are being extremely conditional and unaccepting of your authentic self, you will allow conditional individuals in your space. And with that, you will only be ALLOWED to go so far before you’re reminded of the ROLE you are supposed to play.
My continuous affirmation for protection against conditional relations is this:
I solemnly swear or affirm…
That I AM an espiritu libre..
For the simple fact that I adamantly REFUSE to PARTICIPATE in anything that makes me feel constrained or subservient…
I will no longer ASSOCIATE myself with any organization that encourages me to be self-abasing or subordinate to another flawed human being…
I DECLINE ALL invitations that will result in me falsifying my intrinsic nature to force my larger than life essence into a box….
I WILL NO LONGER alter my identity to gain approval from substandard entities…
I AM a beautifully, uniquely-made, unprecedented individual..
I will not apologize for my alluring attributes that exceed your comprehension….
YOU no longer have permission to hold me hostage to your projected insecurities..
I AM no longer honoring your perceptions…because I realize my aspirations surpass your radar.
Your fears will be rerouted onto a road that leads relentlessly back to you…and you will EAT the words that you so boldly speak against my expedition.
Your cogitations serve no purpose for the passageway that I have been divinely escorted into.
Your chains have incapacitated…And I am setting my own self FREE!
I solemnly swear or affirm that I will BE EXACTLY what I came here to be.