Conditional versus unconditional love…pt. 2

On this post, you will notice that I make reference to two totally distinct ideas of a progenitor of humanity. This was important for me to dive into this topic in its relation to conditional versus unconditional love, because our beliefs shape our actions. And if a person has subjected themselves to limited thought processes by following a doctrine, then this concept of unconditional love will be extremely distorted, in my opinion.

As a repeated disclaimer, I am not a participant or believer in any organized religion on this planet. However, I do encompass spiritual understandings that are personal and based on my own unique experiences.


When I speak of “God”, I am speaking of the character (above) that has been described in the Bible…A patriarchal, controlling, vengeful idea of a “God” that was and is forced upon many. The one that sits high and looks low….formed humanity from dust and punished the woman for eating fruit in a garden. The one that judges people for their mishaps and is planning a future massacre on those who have not followed confusing and contradicting instructions. The one that made decrees for “his” people to murder natives that were living on various lands.

When I speak of “Creator,” I am referencing a concept that many indigenous people spoke of as the progenitor of creation…more of a mother/father, balanced, masculine and

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feminine energetic idea of a Creator…one that is more correctly imagined as we see appearing in humanity every single day. The physical representation of a male implanting his seed into a wombman and creating another human life.

Many faith-based believers across the world feel strongly that a loving, all-knowing, all-present “God” loves them unconditionally and only wants the best for their lives. They describe the life of a person who “died on a cross” for the so-called “sins” of many thousands of years ago. And because of that, humanity is supposed to be forever indebted to habitual worship, gratitude, and adoration of this being.

My question of this theory is based on human experience. When heterosexuals are attracted to the opposite energy of themselves, it is done to intentionally create life. When the indigenous people looked into their reality and visualized the process of creation from animals and other human species, it was a natural thought to say hmmm…maybe the Creator of us all is composed of a male and female? Someone would have to contemplate long and hard to come up with a male “God” or deity that gives life to humanity all by “him”self. This type of idea would have to be implanted or indoctrinated into a person’s mind. It would most likely not be an innate thought.

Furthermore, my thought process is that anything meant to occur should not have to be forced. IF it was meant for me or my ancestors to experience this “greatness” from the bible God, it would have flowed into our existence smoothly and without any resistance. An idea of a loving “God” that is trying to save you would not be scary would it? Let’s just say, for example, you are a homeless person living on the street. If someone walks up to you with food and a warm, loving heart saying, “Please accept me because I want to help save you from the elements and take you somewhere safe,” is that supposed to be scary? Or would you be able to recognize the energy of that person to know their intentions are pure? As human nature, we would readily reject something when it feels strange, off, or our gut feeling is telling us that something is not right.

So when the natives were approached with this foreign idea of “God,” completely contrary to what they were already practicing, wouldn’t you think they had a just stance? Possibly in their minds, they’re thinking an all-loving parent would not beat their children into submission or instruct others to beat individuals into a belief. This was strange behavior to them…abuse. Mentally and/or physically beating someone into a way of living will only cause fear-based control. This is not an accurate representation of unconditional love.

My journey to freedom from this mindset was initiated when I became a mother. I felt genuine unconditional love for the first time in my life after I witnessed the internal growth and then birth of my children. YES, even the marriage that I subjected myself to was FULL of conditional love, because I was not exposed to any previous teachings that explained to me what it meant to really love someone unconditionally. Seeing the faces of precious, pure human life that I created was an experience that I am grateful for, because it was the catalyst to my evolution. The two children that I gave birth to taught me selfless, boundless, immeasurable LOVE. There is NO-THING they could ever do to sway me to feel otherwise about them. I will love my babies to the end of time, whether they continue their journey with my guidance or without it. This is the true energy of unconditional love.

CONDITIONAL: subject to one or more conditions or requirements being met; made or granted on certain terms.

UNCONDITIONAL: not subject to any conditions.

“Unconditional love is known as affection without any limitations, or love without conditions. This term is sometimes associated with other terms such as true altruism or complete love.”
The idea that the bible “God” accepts anyone regardless is a recruitment tactic used to lure a person into the belief system. It sounds so beautiful and lovely to be welcomed with open arms no matter who or what you are. But the moment you become so deeply entrapped into the religion, you will begin to notice those things they said didn’t matter actually does. You will have to completely change everything about yourself and then some in order to be accepted by the members AND “God.”

The God of the bible places many stipulations on a person before they can be worthy to receive love. Although believers spew different understandings from their mouth based on an emotional attachment, the scriptures make it clear that this God is only concerned with your well being IF you are abiding by laws that “he” has set forth. Other than that, you can throw the love out of the window…to HELL you go!

Ecclesiastes 12:13

Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man.

Matthew 7:21-23
21 “Not everyone who says to Me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ shall enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father in heaven. 22 Many will say to Me in that day, ‘Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in Your name, cast out demons in Your name, and done many wonders in Your name?’23 And then I will declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from Me, you who practice lawlessness!’

Proverbs 1:26-28
26 I also will laugh at your calamity; I will mock when your fear cometh;
27 When your fear cometh as desolation, and your destruction cometh as a whirlwind; when distress and anguish cometh upon you.
28 Then shall they call upon me, but I will not answer; they shall seek me early, but they shall not find me:

Many will argue that hell is a choice, because the only thing unbelievers have to do is accept the bible God in their life in order to be “saved” from punishment. However, this type of thinking is conditional within itself. It places CONDITIONS on this God’s nurturing capabilities. It is saying that this God is only concerned with your well being if you choose “his” way. It is of a father that is saying in human terms, “Do as I say or you won’t have my blessing.” “Live the life that I (as your parent) want you to live, or you will not have my financial support or my love.” Does this make sense why this is unloving and extremely conditional?

The idea that you will not be “saved” from punishment or some sort of suffering because you did not follow the bible God’s way is not unconditional love. If I as a parent tell my child not to play with scissors, but he or she does so anyway, am I going to turn my back on them when they begin to bleed profusely after cutting themselves deeply? Or am I going to show compassion and unconditional love by helping them anyway REGARDLESS of them not accepting my guidance. If my child gets into a car accident due to not following my guidance of abstaining from cell phone usage during driving, and they turn out severely injured and/or crippled, am I going to allow them to be a vegetable and disown them as if they never existed? An unconditionally loving parent would not do that. But parents that operate under conditional love may think such thoughts. And this is exactly what the bible God stands for.

By default, humans choose the path of least resistance. If you are presented with two choices and one seemingly appears to be undesirable or torturous, you will innately choose the path that is less tumultuous.

If a parent desires for their child to go to college to continue a family legacy of, say, being a doctor…let’s just say a child is born in a family of doctors that was repetitive with each generation. This parent then explains to their child that in order for them to have the family’s blessing in their career endeavors, including financial support, then they must choose to study to become a doctor. If they choose any other career, they will have to pay for school on their own using loans or some other form of payment. Additionally, their housing, food, and other means of living will have to be financed using their own methods. Many children will choose the path of least resistance…go on to become a doctor, even though they really wanted to be something else…just to keep their family smiling and to receive support. However, others may choose to live outside of the box and make decisions that are pleasing to their own desires. They break the chain of generational doctors and go on to become an educator or some other career path. And they most likely live happier lives because they don’t feel obligated to work in a career that they are disinterested in.

This analogy is the same as religion. Many of our families have followed Christianity and other religions simply because it was a generational habit. No one ever thought to question it or do anything different because they didn’t want to lose their parents’ blessing or adoration. In reality, they wanted to continue to feel loved by doing what their parents wanted them to do. But a parent (or deity) that is all-loving and practicing unconditional love WILL NOT PUNISH NOR CURSE THEIR CHILDREN for not accepting their way. Reference the aforementioned definition of conditional…this would be it!

Fear of nonacceptance and fear of rejection keep us locked down in modes of operation that no longer serve our highest good. Any Creator of humanity would only want for its creation to live happy, mentally and physically healthy lives. An all-loving “God” would not have its creation living day to day life out of fear.

It’s easier to make an excuse and say..”Our ways are not God’s ways..”, but shouldn’t you ask instead…Why not? Why are we as humans thinking with pure hearts and attempting to love others unconditionally but the bible God has an issue with that? This should prompt you to ask questions about the belief system that you are fighting so hard to defend and coach others into. Something does not sit right about the heart of this deity. And it could be because it is not the voice of a loving, unconditional Creator, but the voice of controlling malicious-hearted humans who only intended for humanity to maintain a robotic lifestyle. Who was there to hear the voice that told a person to write some instructions on a stone or mass produce instructions in a book to sell? “God” wants us to know about instructions so desperately, “he” created trees to be used for paper, to then be used for money to be used to PURCHASE a book that’s suppose to get us to “heaven.” Or would a Creator give us creation and natural resources…FREE thought…and other FREE resources to help us understand our life purpose? I would probably place a bet for the latter.

I won’t make this post any longer. But I do have a feeling there will be a part 3 coming soon….

Unconditional love is desperately needed on this planet. We have enough people suffering in silence due to self-love deficiency and living lives out of fear of a future punishment. What would happen if we began to love ourselves unconditionally so that we can love others unconditionally? The saying is that hurt people hurt other people..what would happen if unconditionally loving people loved other unconditionally loving people?

I hope that you live your life freely and unrestricted by others’ opinions or obligations. Your life is YOURS to live…..make sure you are truly living it.

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2 Comments Add yours

  1. Christen says:

    I like the post but you could’ve made your point without bringing any religion into it.. you are speaking from your own personal opinion and it’s quite insulting. You simply don’t understand God or the scriptures and that’s okay because we all interpret things differently. Though I would love a chance to clarify some of these things if you’d be willing to have an open minded discussion. I’m no bible thumper by any means but I think you might find my personal opinion interesting.

    1. Christen, we all have diverse minds. I analyze things based on my experience and my reality. My blog posts are unconventional and structured to stimulate unrestricted thought. I understand numerous things about the scriptures due to thorough research and studying. I was also a believer for over 20 years. I understand that an opinion could be insulting coming from someone who is emotionally detached from religion. However, this is an open/unbiased forum and I welcome your ideas. I would LOVE to hear your opinion on this topic as well. 💜💜💙💙💚

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