Are you in an Ego trap?

We hear this term Ego used a lot in our society. But what exactly is Ego?

Ego, as in self-esteem, is the most recognized definition. It’s how you see yourself. To a certain extent, this part of ourselves is necessary. Because if you don’t see yourself as beautiful or of a certain merit, then who else will? This part of our ego protects us from the feeling of selflessness. It helps us to radiate a certain energy so that we’re not easily put in a place to be emotionally controlled.

Is this the Ego trap I’m referring to? Of course not. Abraham Maslow describes in his Hierarchy of Needs that the Self-Esteem or Ego is a need that humans possess to feel respected…valued…prestige.

If you have a business, it would probably benefit you to have that Ego so that others can buy into your products. Big-ups to my fellow Virgo, Beyonce!! She gave a perfect visual of Ego, and in fact uses it to promote her brand. She also explains how a Big Ego is what attracted her to a certain type of male. All in fun, individuals with a certain type of ego (B.K.A. SWAG) is indeed attractive!

The type of Ego trap I am referring to is on the opposite side of the spectrum. It’s unattractive, for me at least. It turns me off to a person. The part of the Ego that makes you believe you are the only one in existence that has all of the answers to life. The part of Ego that tells you just because you have mastered certain lessons, you are now a walking, talking, image of divinity and shouldn’t be challenged about what you’re spewing to others as FACTS.

The moment you are sure you have all of the answers to life and put yourself on a pedestal to give others “knowledge”, you’re in a Ego Trap. Humble yourself or life WILL humble you.

Now, I don’t say this to belittle anyone for their efforts to help give others information that they may not be aware of. Perfect example, I authored a book for military spouses to enlighten them of some rare information about the armed forces. (Shameless plug)…if you know someone who may be interested in a copy click here to learn more about it!! However, the tone of my work is not degrading or offensive to anyone. I didn’t say, “Buy my book or I’m not your friend anymore!” “Get this information, or you’re a lost sheep.” It was simply, hey, did you know about this information? If not, it MAY help you. And so on and so forth.

Having an ego that puts yourself on a pillar above others is, in my opinion, something that is taught heavily in religion. It is the number one cause, in my opinion, of people going throughout their days projecting what they perceive as FACTS onto others. It is the cause of the arrogant, “know it all”, attitudes portrayed across America. All male-dominant religions claim to be THE only way to salvation.

This Ego was ONE of many reasons why evangelists sailed across the seas to come to the New World and CONVERT people who were different than them. The native Americans just simply wanted to live in tune with nature. They didn’t NEED another person’s perspective on life to “save” them from anything. They were already living a life of bliss. The evangelists came from a war-stricken environment, so maybe their belief is what encouraged THEM. But if it’s not broken, then why fix it?

What would it look like if I traveled all the way to Thailand to try and tell the people their world is in impending danger if they’re already living in peace? Imagine me going to their peaceful land saying, “Accept my God so that you can be saved from the judgment.” They’re going to look at me crazy! And say, Nah, YOUR country may be in impending danger, but we’re good on this side of the earth! Do you see why people have a rightful stance to question what you are bringing to them as “truth?” Maybe they already have peace and are not on a journey of FINDING peace like you are.

This need to persuade others into a lifestyle because you perceive it to be THE ONE AND ONLY WAY is a trap of the Ego. I realize that may be hard to digest. But trying to coach someone into a way of life is irrational especially when you’re not even allowing others to speak THEIR truth. It’s almost as if missionaries are trained to drop belief and then “Do not pass Go. Do not collect $200.”

My way will not be your way. Our life paths are different. Our souls will not require the same nourishment. Your struggles as a child aren’t my struggles. Your pain is not my pain. Your insecurities aren’t my insecurities. So my soul may be thirsty for something else that cannot be relegated to your belief.

Now this is no judgement……hopefully some constructive criticism can be taken from this.

I was raised in the southern part of the United States, so I’m speaking from experience and an unbiased perspective when I say this…..Some southern Christians across the United States have the WORST SPIRITUAL EGOS. I’m talking about the devout Christians that attend church services at LEAST 3 days a week……the ones who have been DELIVERT from their previous lifestyles, and now have found a way to be righteous in the sight of “God.” They have all the answers and you can’t tell them ANYTHING!

Faith believers, I respect you for your genuine efforts to INSPIRE. I know that some of you truly believe you are helping others create a better reality for themselves by sharing a part of your life that has helped you overcome obstacles. I know that you PROBABLY don’t even realize that you’re in a spiritual ego. You have been taught that this is your duty to recruit others into this lifestyle. You may have been indoctrinated into this lifestyle since birth and you know no other way. But I want you to use that same analogy and apply it to others across the world who are just like you, except they were born into the Catholic doctrine, or the doctrine of Hindu, or the doctrine of Haile Selassie, or the 7th day Adventist doctrine, or the doctrine of Jehovah Witnesses, Islam, INDIGENOUS practices….does this make sense? Because you are born into a certain religious lifestyle does not make it INDISPUTABLE FACTS that should be perpetuated all across the earth. And I apologize if this hurts you or makes you feel uncomfortable.

I’ve journeyed into the Hebrew Israelite teachings for just a BRIEF moment LMAO, because it got real when I started asking too many questions. But some of their doctrines teach spiritual ego as well. I was told that since I wanted to journey outside of the states to see how beautiful this earth was, I would be PUNISHED by THE MOST HIGH for leaving the land of captivity. They teach that the Hebrews are the “chosen ones” that will be spared from danger, while everyone else will be judged. Everybody that was still wrapping their mouths around PORK would be tossed in the lake of fire during judgement! This was similar to the Christian doctrine of non-believers being judged, just with a little spin.

Keep in mind, I’m not making fun of any of these beliefs, because the two (Christianity and Hebrew-Judaism) both had an influence on me at one point in my life. I was right there with them with my egotistical ways. I was so self-righteous, everyone else needed to get to where I was. I had the “Word”, so that made me automatically correct while others were lost. When I laugh at these things, I’m more so laughing at myself for the errors of my ways. That’s how I am as a person. I can sit back and laugh at all the crazy things I have done or any hurt that I have experienced in life. So please don’t think that I am making fun of believers in this post.

I remember when I first got married. I had my head so high up in the clouds, because I was married and I was SAVED from the judgement of having sex without a ring on my finger. Now I could have RIGHTEOUS SEX in the sight of the “Lord.” I got a ring on my finger, so now I can TELL others that they need to seek the same commitment for themselves. Now I can hold my head high because I have children IN WEDLOCK and not out of wedlock. Just SELF-RIGHTEOUS. And it’s disgusting now that I reflect.

This is the attitude that we are parading around with and forgetting that we have our own inner issues. We forget that we have our moments where we enjoy some of the same things that these so-called “sinners” enjoy. Just because you made a CHOICE to live a certain lifestyle does not mean it’s the antidote for everyone else.

There is no reward for treating others this way. You are operating in EGO because you haven’t learned that there is no one-size-fit-all approach to this life. That’s the beauty of living in a realm that has multiple realities to fit our multiple personalities and our ever-expanding consciousness.

Another example…..

Let me divert away from religion and reflect on this BACK TO NATURE self-righteousness.

There’s a lot of vegans, raw fooders, fruititarians, breathitarians (yes this is a thing), who believe that their methods are the TRUE way to holistic healing. And if a person is dumping “meat” into their body, then they’re unclean….their vessel cannot be used to uplift the vibrations of the earth.

Now, are there some eating habits that have been without a doubt PROVEN to be the cause of most illnesses? Absolutely. But the part that concerns me is when people begin judging others for not living the life they live. When they behave just like faith-based believers…cutting people off for not following their lifestyle because they’re of a “low vibration.”

For my personal evolution, it may feel AMAZING to eat only fruits and grains and no meat. It may help my body to thrive more efficiently throughout the day. But should I now go around TELLING others to eat JUST LIKE ME because it is the ONLY WAY to avoid disease? Probably not. Because I have encountered others who can eat whatever they want and they function just fine day to day. I know an elder who lived to be 100 years old and he was a meat eater. It is their choice. If it’s not broken, then why try to fix it?

Another example, I am lactose-intolerant. So if I eat dairy (mainly yogurt or ice-cream) my body will go into shock. And I’ll experience headaches, mucus buildup, and other things that let me know my body is rejecting this substance. So because of that, I have decided to limit my dairy intake. But should I go around PREACHING to others that dairy is the root of disease? Probably not, because I live in an environment where people eat ice-cream every day! They may not even experience bloating or mucus buildup. If it’s not an issue for them, then why try to fix it? I can’t eat onions because it makes my pores reek! Like, I’m just being transparent for a minute. It’s unbearable for my own nose, the smell comes out of every pore in my body. But does that mean everyone else should now stop eating onions? No, my grandmother eats onions raw and has no body odor issues afterwards.

So the moral of this story is simple….

“People who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones”

Some of the very people whom we are judging have a character flaw that we also HAVE or once had. Ask yourself, how does their life habits affect you? Is it going to stop your ascension?

Some of those free spirits that you’re cutting out of your lives are a reflection of your own inner curiosities and desire to be free. The difference is, they are living their life BOLDLY while you are still scared. So be careful what stones you are throwing at someone else, especially if you are ill-prepared to accept the same judgments.

If any of this stepped on your toes a little bit, then you may be caught in a spiritual Ego trap. Maybe you are ignorant… meaning: showing a lack of knowledge of a particular subject. Get to know people by their character, THEIR life experience and not by their religious preference. Your scope of experience may only be limited to a certain group of people….small town. So as long as everybody is in agreement with you, then you must feel that your beliefs are absolutely true! Because you haven’t been challenged by others who have real questions that would push you further and study the historical context of your belief.

Maybe this Ego comes from the fact that you have placed road blocks in your mind to shield yourself from other perspectives. But how fair is that to have someone listen to your deliverance story, when you don’t want to hear theirs unless it’s from the same religion? That’s Ego.

Maybe you have only lived in one geographical location your whole life. You can resolve this Ego by traveling a bit to experience other realities….round yourself into an individual that can see life from many facets and be humble enough to understand others.

In any case, I can only make a suggestion for you to try and figure out what it is before you try to TELL others how to live.

This is a mantra that can be spoken daily to help you overcome that spiritual ego trap you are in…


Shout it from the rooftops. Say it every morning if you need to. Maybe you can say this to yourself until you see changes in your judgement of others.

From the words spoken by Kendrick Lamar himself (but I’m going to say it more modestly, LOL)….

“Sit down…Be humble…”

Please do a self-evaluation. Before you tell someone “Jesus died on the cross for your sins,” make sure that you have done your research ON YOUR OWN. Don’t depend on the things your Pastor has told you about the research he has done. Have YOU done your own due diligence. Do you know that there is no “sin” attached to verifying things outside of your teacher? Because you will go out into this world and get a wake up call when you come face to face with those who HAVE done their research. So just be aware of that.

Additionally, make sure you’re not turning away a person who genuinely loves you because their belief is different. Because when LIFE humbles you, you will have to reflect on the days when you were too busy judging them…pressing delete because they didn’t fit into your box. You may one day look around to find that very person who loved you unconditionally is no where to be found because your EGO ran them away.

There’s no reward to separatism. If anything, it will lead you down a road of loneliness. Once you get outside of that box, you will be able to see life from more than just one perspective. It will help humble you.

What will humanity gain by us using spiritual ego to be separate from each other when we are ALL under the same umbrella created by the same mother and father of humanity? No matter what name people have given their “God”, it is all just a human desire to comprehend the ALL…the unseen Creators. We’re all just using our imagination to create stories that help us figure things out. So why are we arguing and feuding over concepts?

I hope that we (including myself) can all learn something from the above statements. I know that I still have a lot of learning to do on this journey. And I’m open to learning from others. It gives me great pleasure to sit in a spot as a student.

I will just be thankful for the day when separatism is shattered into pieces and we can all get along in spite of our differences. Wishful thinking…..


#selfevaluate #befree #L.O.V.E #separatismdestroyshumanityandrelationships #liveandletotherslive #findyourwonpeace #differencesareNOTasin

2 Comments Add yours

  1. holisticallyrefined says:

    Love this

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